Yesterday I attended my new niece's christening. She is the first girl to be born in the family in 12 years and was welcomed with open arms. My brother-in-law and his wife named her Hallie and she is the prettiest thing. While I was holding her, she fell asleep so I went to put her down. It woke her up and she began crying so I picked her back up and sang her some lullabys. I haven't had a chance to sing those in a long time since my boys are getting older. She just looked at me until her eyes finally closed. I want a baby girl now. Dave and I had discussed having another one and had decided not to for various reasons, but every now and then the urge to have another one comes over me.

If I did have another baby, almost surely I would have the post partum depression again since I had it twice before. I can't handle that again. I wouldn't be able to breast feed if I was on medications too, but that can be dealt with. I don't know. I guess I should just forget about it and enjoy my kids and my nieces and nephews while I can. Family is so important.